Do I want to have children?

Whether you are in a relationship or single, heterosexual or lesbian,
the decision whether to have children or not is the biggest decision
of your life. As a life coach, I can help you to work through some of the issues you may be dealing with in making this decision. Some of the questions which my clients are struggling with include:

• Is now the right time to start a family?
• I’m happy with my life now – do I really want it to change?
• My partner doesn’t want a baby but I do.
• What will be the impact on my career/finances/lifestyle?
• I’m single and I don’t know whether I want to go it alone.
• I think I want to remain childfree but I find the social pressure to have kids difficult.

Through using coaching techniques and exercises, I aim to facilitate you to come to the decision that is right for you. Over the time we are working together we will shine a spotlight on your fears (of having children and also of remaining childfree), we will look at how you can 'be with' and integrate polarities that many of my baby decision clients find they are struggling with such as being in control vs. letting go or unknown vs the known and explore how you can stop the worry/anxiety/stressful thoughts so you can address the decision from a calm, clear and centred place. If you are struggling in how you communicate or discuss the issue with others including your partner, then we will look at how you can communicate and discuss your feelings with them in a confident and calm way. We now also offer - in conjunction with my associate Judy Van Zon (a trained relationship coach) relationship coaching for couples who want to work together on this decision. You can find out more about Judy here.

As the testimonals below point out, you will gain clarity into other areas of your life as well - and begin to identify old reactive patterns or 'stuckness' which might be holding you back - both in making this decision AND in the rest of your life.

'I came to Beth because I was in a panic about the decision to have children or not. I was afraid to make the wrong decision and regretting this forever. I have come to realise that there is no wrong or right decision and that I can live with the decision that I make. I feel that I have fully explored the issue and am relieved to know that I will not look back on this time in my life and think that I didn't have the courage to address it head on. Taking the time (6 months) to explore the question with Beth was the best thing I could have done to enable me to move forward on the decision.' (Cassie, Central London, 39)

“I cannot recommend Beth highly enough. I initially came to
coaching because I was struggling with the decision on whether to have a baby. I did not feel that I had friends and family who would have discussed this topic with me without having their own agenda. Beth was just what I needed – she was very supportive but provided guidance in a completely neutral way. I eventually understood that the dilemma was actually a reflection of larger issues in my life, and we went about tackling those first. After 11 months working with Beth, I completed coaching with greater insight on a number of areas in my life, in addition to clarifying the baby decision.” (Crystal, NYC, 36)

My blog at http://www.childrenornot.blogspot.com explores the issues raised in making this decision. Please check out the blog - and let me know if there are any topics you would be keen for me to explore on the blog.